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Nitwit News – October 10
Nitwit News – October 10

We’ve all been there before: You just ate at your favorite raw chicken food trailer in that shady part of town, and now you have to drive home at twice the posted speed limit so you can get to a toilet before it’s too late. But is that enough of a reason to lead the police on a chase? For one man in Garden City, Utah, the answer is yes. Yes it was. Jeffrey Laub went speeding through a canyon at 111 mph, leading a Utah Highway Patrol Trooper on what was described as an offroad Dukes of Hazzard-style pursuit, because he ate some food that upset his stomach and was trying to reach a toilet. Laub’s excuse didn’t fly with a judge, who sentenced him to seven days in jail after he was convicted of failure to stop at the command of a police officer, impaired driving, reckless driving, speeding and open container.

Airline flights can be long and stressful and sometimes you just want to do what a British airline passenger did — well, except for the whole “getting tasered” part. The 52-year-old who had flown into Manchester, England, from Malta, having had a few too many drinks, stripped naked on the airport tarmac and challenged the pilot to a fight. He also urinated on the terminal wall. A woman traveling with him got so fed up with his bad behavior that she slapped him in the face.

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