Holstein and Company Mornings

Nitwit News – May 7
Nitwit News – May 7

New York City cops have come pounding on the door of James Jordan Sr.’s home four times in the last year. Each time, they search the place, leaving it a mess. Once they even arrested Jordan’s son, James Jr., on a weapons possession charge that was eventually thrown out. But in each raid, they never find James Jordan Sr., who they say is evading capture on an outstanding warrant. There’s a good reason that the senior Jordan is never at the Brooklyn home when the cops arrive. Or any other time: he’s been dead for eight years.

… Jordan Sr., who was employed as a security guard, died of diabetes complications on March 17, 2006. But that fact has failed to discourage the New York cops from raiding his home more than dozen times since then.

Attendees at a Salt Lake City, Utah, wedding were shocked to spot a 60-year-old woman and a 56-year-old man engaging in sex acts on the church lawn. An officer was summoned to the church by a wedding guest who ran into the road to stop a passing police cruiser. The officer approached the couple, who were laying on the church lawn get their sexy on. Their 56- and 60-year-old sexy.

Interviews & Bits

Sgt. Bruce

Sgt. Bruce on Local Nitwits

We asked Sgt. Bruce to share some stories of local knuckleheads and nitwits.

PODCAST pod

Willie Waffle Doesn’t Like The Identical

To celebrate 20 years Forest Gump is back in theaters — and it’s on IMAX. There’s also a new movie called The Identical.

gina

Gina Talks About Bad Marital Advice

Life coach Gina says we should ignore this marital advice.

PODCAST pod

Waffle Reviews November Man & As Above/So Below

Movie guy Willie Waffle gave one movie 1 out of 4 and the other 0 out of 4!

Sgt. Bruce and Cop Cameras

Champaign police cars have cameras. How do they work and will the police be wearing cameras soon?  

gina

How to Tell Someone They Smell

We asked life coach Gina how to tell someone they stink or have bad breath.

PODCAST pod

We TRIED to do the Ice Bucket Challenge

We were ready to do the Ice Bucket Challenge … and planning to challenge a local “celebrity”. Then the U of I…

Sylvester Stallone

Expendables 3 and The Giver not good

Willie gives E3 one and a half “waffles” and The Giver just one.