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Nitwit News – August 27
Nitwit News – August 27

We all know at least one person who would show up late to their own funeral. The well-known saying is meant to be hypothetical, but in the case of 50-year-old Philadelphia woman Sharolyn Jackson the saying is true. That’s because Jackson was found alive almost two weeks after her funeral. It turns out, her family misidentified another woman’s body thinking it was Jackson after they received a call about an unidentified woman found dead on a West Philly street. The woman matched the description of Jackson, and was officially identified by two people — her son and a social worker. Jackson’s mother, Carrie Minney told the Associated Press that the woman they buried looked exactly like her daughter with the exception of her nose.

A Texas Tech student was allowed to wear a pasta strainer on his head for an official state ID. Eddie Castillo convinced the Department of Public Safety he should be allowed to don the kitchenware, based on his religious freedom to worship the “Flying Spaghetti Monster.” Members of the tongue-in-cheek “Pastafarian” church pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster to advocate for greater separation of church and state.

… Earlier this year DMV workers in New Jersey called police on a man who insisted on wearing a pasta strainer on his head during the taking of his driver’s license photo. Police advised Aaron Williams that the pasta strainer was not approved by the motor vehicle office and he would have to apply to the state to wear it in his license photo. Williams reluctantly agreed to have his picture taken without the strainer.

Interviews & Bits

Sgt. Bruce

Sgt. Bruce on Local Nitwits

We asked Sgt. Bruce to share some stories of local knuckleheads and nitwits.

PODCAST pod

Willie Waffle Doesn’t Like The Identical

To celebrate 20 years Forest Gump is back in theaters — and it’s on IMAX. There’s also a new movie called The Identical.

gina

Gina Talks About Bad Marital Advice

Life coach Gina says we should ignore this marital advice.

PODCAST pod

Waffle Reviews November Man & As Above/So Below

Movie guy Willie Waffle gave one movie 1 out of 4 and the other 0 out of 4!

Sgt. Bruce and Cop Cameras

Champaign police cars have cameras. How do they work and will the police be wearing cameras soon?  

gina

How to Tell Someone They Smell

We asked life coach Gina how to tell someone they stink or have bad breath.

PODCAST pod

We TRIED to do the Ice Bucket Challenge

We were ready to do the Ice Bucket Challenge … and planning to challenge a local “celebrity”. Then the U of I…

Sylvester Stallone

Expendables 3 and The Giver not good

Willie gives E3 one and a half “waffles” and The Giver just one.