Holstein and Company Mornings

Best Parenting Tweets
Best Parenting Tweets

What moms and dads have shared recently on Twitter.

• If you’re wondering if “mom brain” is real, I just put perfume on for a Skype call. Sit with that. (@BunmiLaditan)

• Anyone that says there are no stupid questions has never had to explain to a 5 year old why there are no pink bananas 267 times today. (@Shock_Monster)

• My toddler is so effective at preventing me from getting any work done that she’s legally considered a member of Congress. (@DLin71)

• Before you go crazy on those baby-making plans, just remember children need to be fed THREE+ times a day. Think about it. Think hard. (@carlykimmel)

• For her bday my daughter REALLY wants the $130 Isabelle American Girl doll…or the $20 doll from the craft store. Decisions, decisions… (@LetMeStart)

• Sorry kids, when the ice cream truck plays music, it means he’s all out of ice cream. (@liberalcannon)

• Ben starts baseball practice tomorrow, so I start my bi-weekly prayer for rain. (@ScaryMommy)

• That special moment in a Dad’s life when he looks at his kids & realizes that they’re FINALLY big enough to get him a beer outta the fridge. (@dshack8)

• My 4yo son is singing in the shower, “I’m pooooping in the shower right now!” He’s bluffing. Totally bluffing. He may not be bluffing. (@SammyHuntington)

• Only 95% of my conversations with my wife involve a child’s bowel movements, so, no, the romance isn’t dead. (@XplodingUnicorn)

• Toddlers are like puppies who wear shoes and can talk. (@Faux_Ma)

• Dear English language: I’m proposing the word ‘sleep’ is dropped from the word ‘sleepover’. Signed, A tired parent. (@jetts31)

Interviews & Bits

Tim McGraw

Are Tim and Faith divorcing?

One website says there are clues that the two are finished! Holstein and Company is calling bull

podcast 2

Is it okay to wear underwear more than one day?

Scientists say yes! Melissa says YUCK

cell phone

Nitwit News Monday- Thieves butt-dial their victim

If you’re going to rob someone, you may want to lock your smartphones’ keypad

clown nitwit

Weird Fears and Phobias

People have some strange fears, including balloons, worms, cotton balls and unfinished wooden benches!

WP-AmericanSniper-620x400

Waffle loves American Sniper

He liked The Imitation Game and says Paddington was better than he thought it would be